Sheila Gruenwald
The Journey Out is a book that will help you and encourage your heart and sole to move forward. Sheila candidly shares her story of trials and then shares the strength, determination and fortitude it took to reclaim her life. After reading The Journey Out there will be no doubt in your mind that you, too can claim back your life- if you truly want to.
Sheila Gruenwald is a self motivated teacher and entrepreneur who insists on turning each life experience into fuel to move forward. Growing up in a small redneck town in central British Columbia she learned early that life was not all that one dreams it to be.
But she has never stopped dreaming, never stopped reaching for one more dream.
Now, as a single mother of four children Sheila relates her story of turning trials into treasures. She shares her life in a way that will motivate anyone to stand up, brush off the dirt and mud, take another deep breath and move forward.
Chapter One
MEMORIES
The Precedent is Set
As I clenched my degree and held it high for the world to see the wind embraced and acknowledged my victory. Flooding like a torrent the memories surged past my eyes in hot tears of passion. Fleeting before me were the memories of each step it took to be here today. The painful and the joyful each responsible for moulding me into the women of courage that I am today.
Long had I held onto the belief that it was my choice to let life’s adversities develop the character within me or to crumble in their wake. Each time life had slapped me down I chose to stand up, more full of character than before.
My heart began to race as my life unfolded before me. Suddenly I was there standing before my mother.
“I am not lying, I am telling the truth,” I pleaded emphatically, brushing the hot tears from my dirty face into my hair. In all my ten years I had never been more terrified. My mother had never understood me, my motivations, my dreams, my heart. Surely now, after this horrible incident she would see my heart as fragmented as it may be at this very moment. I was seeking, searching her eyes for some hint of compassion or recognition but I could find none.
“Don’t you make up such lies about people. Go to your room!” my mother berated me. My spirit could with stand no more abuse from her. At those words, more harsh than had ever entered my ears before, my heart and spirit broke and fell, fragmented, into the abyss of my sole.
As I quietly obeyed, my stomach tight in knots, I played back the vision in my head of what had just happened. We were just playing, like we often did, building mud castles, chasing frogs and crawling through culverts, hanging out like one of the boys. But that is where it all changed.
My perspective on life changed. My relationship with boys changed. My respect for my mother changed- something I would never be able to regain. My determination changed. I changed.
How did it happen…? Right, We were crawling through the culvert when he asked me to wait for him that he had something to show me. I remember the excitement and wonderment of what he may have discovered this time. As he crawled up beside me I knew something was wrong but it was too late to move, we were too far into the culvert. The air thickened, fear beset my mind. His eyes told a story I did not want to hear or be apart of, but there was no escape.
He started to touch me, first my arm, then my leg-his touch made me cringe. When I told him to stop he began to kiss me so I couldn’t talk. Why was he doing this to me? I tried to push him away but there was no space to move. Suddenly, I was terrified and could not understand why this was happening. I don’t remember how long it was I just knew it was wrong. I closed my eyes and used my mind to put myself somewhere else, somewhere safe, somewhere alone.
