Don't "Bleeping" Do That
How NOT to Manage a Small Business
by
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Starting your own business is like getting married. The first three years are the most difficult. Thereafter it is only hell. You start your company after borrowing money from family, friends and fools. You are full of energy and passion and you can vividly see in your mind how this company is listed on the stock exchange in an initial public offering (IPO) someday in the future. You work very hard and long hours. The company grows so much that you have to employ new people to assist you. This is where the ’fun’ starts! You don’t want to hear some of the things I am now going to tell you. It hurts. Nobody wants to be hurt. You will find that there is nothing new about what I am saying. You knew it all the time. Yet you keep on falling into the same traps. This is why preachers keep their jobs. They have to repeat everything over a lifetime. Everybody hears. Nobody listens. You may find that some of the things I say are outrageous or outright controversial. If what you say is not controversial then you have nothing to say. You make no contribution and maintain the status quo. I tried to avoid giving advice to small business owners. I just wanted to make them aware of all the pitfalls. I guess I did not succeed. The advice that I did give was based on my experience and interaction with small business owners. In some instances I did not give advice because I would have been out of my depth. This is supposed to be a ‘NOT TO’ book and not a ‘HOW TO’ book. Female owners of small businesses may feel that they were short changed. This book is for men and it is written by a man. That is correct in a sense. I am a man who does not understand women. Someone once said, “Men should not try and understand women. They must only love them”. I would suggest that women that read this book must place themselves in the shoes of the men I describe. Everything will become clear. The same principles apply. This book is more about ethics and relationships. It is not so much about hard core issues that you could sort out with logic and reasoning. Hundreds of books have been written on hard core issues. The things I say do not pertain to a particular culture or country. The topics I address happen in all small businesses all over the world. Some of the expressions I use are not my own. I have heard them over a lifetime from different people. I apologise if I have stolen anybody’s thunder! I hated hearing any sentence starting with “Don’t” when I was a child. It was so negative. It cramped my style. I was rebellious. Now I end up writing a whole book about “Don’t”. I could have made it a positive book. People like positive things. They do not like negative things. From a positive point of view the title could have been: The Small Business’ Guide to Screw Everybody. The headings would have been: How to screw the tax man; How to flirt with female employees; How to screw your employees; How to dip your pen in the company’s ink pot. This would have been a highly instructional book. I think it would have been a bestseller! This was not my intention. You will have to live with the “Don’t”. There is an Asian saying, “Those who know don’t say. Those who say don’t know”. Maybe I fall into the last category. You be the judge
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About the Book
This is a ‘Not To’ book and not a ‘How To’ book. The book is full of dark humour and describes the pitfalls that small business owners should avoid while building a business. It discusses the interesting relationships between the owner and his family, employees, customers, suppliers, and the taxman. The owner’s character and personality traits are discussed extensively. Some of the topics are: • Pillow talk. Don’t get ideas ! • Stubbornness. Dammit man! • Innovators. Stow them away • Consultants. Virgins giving sex classes • Loneliness. Get a good friend • Two business plans. I must be mad • The security of yourwife. Do you want food tonight?
About the Author
Sarel Gous was born in and still lives in South Africa. He holds a BSc (electrical engineering, cum laude), as well as an MBA from the University of Pretoria. He worked for government departments and corporate organisations until 1982, when he started his first company; he has worked for himself ever since. In 1996, after a severe car accident, he sold the lucrative companies he had and closed down the less successful ones. He then became a consultant to small business owners. Ever since then, small businesses have become his passion. He has travelled extensively overseas to investigate small business development in various countries. He is also an avid reader of books on small business development, relationships, philosophy, religions of the world, and economic development. He is a keen observer and storyteller.